Recently I was listening to the Fountains of Carrots podcast, and one of the ladies on there was talking about becoming holy through folding a pair of pants. This resonated with me. You see, since I don’t work outside the home, I spend much of my time at home with my two little ones. Sometimes I can feel as though I don’t have the ability to have the impact I want on the rest of the world. Can I go volunteer at the soup kitchen? Well, maybe but that would take so much coordinating it would be unbelievable. Can I become a missionary to a different country? No. So what can I do on my path to become holy? What do I have to work with? How can I build up the church? How can I become holy?Continue reading “Holiness Through What You Have”
I think we all are doing our best to remember our health goals, financial goals, etc. The things that take a lot of discipline and aren’t necessarily enjoyable to do, but have great benefits. All the things we do to be responsible adults.
But what about the things that make life worth living?
Eating your favorite meal? Going out for ice cream? Sleeping in? Trying that new coffee shop? When was the last time you thought of a pleasurable activitiy, wrote it down and actually scheduled it?
I started thinking about this after reading Girl Wash Your Face, and The Empowered Wife. In Girl wah Your Face, the author talks about how she was super disciplined in regard to her physical health, but her stress level was through the roof because she needed to just slow down and take times to do what she loved. I found this so interesting because I though if you ate right and exercised, your would be at optimum health. But that’s not the case. We have to feed our souls. We need joy. Doing what sets your soul on fire fills your cup back up.
What things do you do to fill up your cup?
My husband and I decided to rearrange some things in our home . I really enjoy doing this from time to time, it really refreshes the space and everyone gets excited about it! Creating new zones for things can really improve function in the home. The goal that inspired this change was creating a sort of cubicle area for the desk away from where we have our TV.
As you see in the last photo we made a little homeschool corner. My son and I start homeschool kindergarten this fall! I’m so excited.
I also went to Dollar Tree for the first time in months and got some stuff for the kids and some stuff for organizing the fridge! I was so excited to accomplish this project!
What do you like to do to refresh your space?
Many of us have alot more quantity time with our spouse right now, with many people being forced to work from home.
It sounds great, right? I mean, we are always talking about having more togetherness…
Until, it’s not. We may have unknown expectations that we are projecting onto our spouse, hidden resentments , or we are just feeling all the feelings and they become our target. Because they are right. there.
Our husband withdraws or snaps back.
We feel lonely and neglected.
We treat the drive thru worker with more respect and dignity than our own spouse…wait, what? When you think about it it’s pretty silly but we all get to this place.
So what is the answer? What would Laura Doyle recommend? I think she’d tell us to keep our eyes on our own page. This doesn’t mean your husband has no blame but does mean we can only control ourselves and our behavior. I think she’d tell us :
- Call your girlfriends. Vent to them. Don’t make your husband the only one to hear everything . Talk to the friends who believe in your marriage not the ones that want to bash marriage.
- Practice self care. Make a list of things to do when quarantine is over. Try to do three frivolous things each day, just because you like it. Paint your nails, take a bath, watch silly YouTube videos. This will help you keep a cheerier disposition which uplifts the whole household and makes you more attractive to your husband. Win win.
- Have gratitude. Look for the good. Notice every single good thing your husband does . Write it down. Eventually these things will stand out more . Even take note of the fact that he is at home with you and not somewhere else. That he is doing his job. It’s easy to take these things for granted.
- Smile at your husband.
- Verbally thank your husband for something and look him in the eyes. You have extraordinary power, you know.
- Speak “spouse fulfilling prophecies” – “you are always so helpful with the kids” or “you are always so helpful around the house.”
- Have empathy for your husband. He’s doing something new just like you are. Be the kind of wife you’d want your son to have if he was in this situation, Amen? We can’t all handle everything gracefully all the time and we often expect this of our spouse.
Even though we are undergoing challenging circumstances, if we focus on what we can control our marriage can still thrive.
I follow the YouTuber Jordan Page from “fun cheap or free” and she recently had twins so now she has a total of 8 kids. She has some great mom tips and with a set of twins she’s stressing how she is having her kids step up and do more chores .
I love this! But it’s so so hard. So so important but so so hard.
But nobody said it would be easy, right? I find myself wanting to do things myself because I can do it faster or better or whatever. But it brings me great joy to see my children learn how capable they are.
The other morning I was praying before I got out of bed and I felt inspired to start giving my kids opportunities to earn money.
They don’t get paid for:
- Making their bed
- Brushing their teeth
- Getting dressed
- Cleaning their room
- Tidying their toys
- Clearing the table
- Putting their clothes away
They DO get paid for:
- Helping with laundry that isn’t theirs
- Emptying the dishwasher
- Cleaning the bathroom
- Wiping counters and tables
- Any other chores I think of in the moment.
We live in the country so going all the way to the bank to get cash ain’t happening so we use a jar and some marbles to represent money earned.
So far my kids are so excited about this. They each got their own jar and decorated it with stickers. We looked at toys on Amazon and they each picked one that they are working for. Not only are they learning about saving money and hard work but I have much more leverage as a parent. If they don’t take care of a responsibility like cleaning toys they have to pay me to do it. It’s a win-win!
How do you take care of chores in your household? Do your kids get opportunies to earn money?
I’ve found some awesome apps lately, and I thought I’d share!
Smartlife – I got my husband an Alexa Dot device for his birthday and some smart outlets. Before the Dot even arrived we were able to use this free app to control the outlets. With the push of a button we could turn off lights in the other room. Amazing ! Some might think all the new smart technologies are lazy but I think it’s a smart way for busy people to use there energies on their priorities and not on little things like turning off lights.
Parents in Love App – I can’t say enough good things about this app. Some researchers developed it to help families learn how to manage stress by offering tips for increasing oxytocin and decreasing cortisol and how to talk to a family member when they are upset and help them through their emotions.
Baby Tracker- I am using this app to track my babies feedings and diapers. I like how you can track sleep, tummy time and various other stats. I also like how it tells you the average feedings per day and average diapers per day. Super handy!
Formed – My friend told me about this and I still have so much to explore but it’s basically a Catholic Netflix! There are even children’s tv shows.
Have you found any cool apps recently? I’d love to hear!
I am reading Jennifer Fulwiler’s new book “Your Blue Flame” and I’m loving it! I’m on the chapter called “You Can Take Up Space.”Continue reading “The Life Wheel and You Can Take Up Space”
I’m not sure where this saying came from but I first heard it in one of Jennifer Fulwiler’s books. I interpret as God will not be outdone in generosity. When you generous to the Lord with your time ( i.e. bringing a new baby into the world), talent or treasure , God returns the generosity back to you.
You may or may not have heard, but our beautiful baby boy just entered the world.Continue reading “Every Baby Comes With a Loaf of Bread”
These coronavirus tips aren’t about how to survive the horrible illness itself, but more about the circumstances they create. What makes me qualified to talk about this? Living for more than a year in a rural area as a stay-at-home mom and living a mostly socially isolated life. I’m writing these tips for you as much as a reminder to myself. Sometimes you just need some inspiration and reminders of positive actions to take after you are done with bingeing on junk food and Netflix, amiright?
My Best Coronavirus Tips
- Have regular tidy up time throughout the day. This will help you feel in control. Even if it’s only 5 minutes at a time. After several tidy up sessions, you will start to see the impact it’s making.
- Clean. Cleaning is gratifying in and of itself and keeping you and your family safe from harmful germs and viruses is of course a necessity always. You will get the satisfaction of seeing the difference your efforts make.
- Manage your emotions. If you are feeling tired, lonely, depressed, anxious, etc. Say so. Then move . Dance, sing, go for a walk, do a workout. It will help your emotions to move through youo.
- Do what you can do . I love this quote “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t. “
- Write letters. Who doesn’t love to get mail?
- Video chats. You’d be surprised and how uplifting these can actually be!
- Call people. Don’t wait for them to call you. Trust me they were truly hoping for a phone call and will be so glad you did.
- Get creative, use what you have. You don’t have to go to the store and buy new things to be creative. Use what you have!
- Declutter. Use the lens, if I’m not using it now when I have more time on my hands than when?
- Decorate . Again, use what you have. Pick flowers from your garden. Paint a picture and re-suse a frame. Display some pretty books.
- Meal plan. For many of us we have more time to spend in the kitchen. Try to use up your pantry and cook creatively.
- Make a new routine and accept and adjust as needed. Accept that this is life right now and try to find way to enjoy it and make sure you meet your needs. It doesn’t have to be a strict routine but one that can keep you on track. You will find that even following it loosely makes a difference.
- Write. Start a blog. Start writing that book you’ve been wanting to write. Write a poem.
- Read. Catch up on all those books your friends have been telling you about. Read a self-help book about an area of your life you need to improve in. It’s always a great time to learn something new.
- Get outside. I’ve been trying to walk a little after each meal. It’s great to get some fresh air and sunshine, and take in nature’s beauty.
- Move. Like I said above, you gotta move your body to help your mind. Keep it fun, you don’t need to learn how to do burpess right now unless that sets your heart on fire.
- Reward yourself. For every positive, healthy behavior you engage in, put a marble in a jar. When it’s full, reward yourself with a new tool that will help advance you toward your goals.
- Delight in the mundane. There are things that simply must be done. Dishes and laundry. Make it fun with music, an audiobook , or podcast.
- Take pictures and save to a special folder on your phone. When we are out of this nightmare make a photobook so you can look back and say “look what I did”
- Bake. Learn to bake bread. Bake cookies. Bake biscotti. Make a cake for no reason.
Clutterbug talks about having 12 things to focus on to keep you on track. https://castbox.fm/x/id65
What are you all doing to stay sane?
How to Respond to Negative People
We all have these people in our life. They love to complain, won’t take advice, and if you are a happy person they think it’s because you are lucky and not because of your attitude. We all have problems. Some people are negative because they are so overwhelmed and don’t know what to do and think the situation is hopeless, some are under too much stress and so see everything through a negative lens, and some are just naturally pessimistic.Continue reading “How to Respond to Negative People”